It is a dangerous venture, deciding to buy customized shoes. Not just for the money involved, mind you. No, it is dangerous because I spend hours considering different color combinations, trying to decide whether to add platforms, wondering if I should try a new model, prioritizing my desires, … The result? I had an entire, lengthy dream about shoes. A dream that included my shoe enabler, from which I awoke too early in the morning because my mind was playing some kind of masochistic shoe game. (You know those dreams you get when you have a fever? The ones where your mind races and you can’t stop it? This was how I felt upon waking this morning.)
The good news is that I found some answers. After that strange dream and fitful awakening, I think I have finally decided what I want. Thank you to my shoe enabler who, after putting this idea back into my head, also helped me out by bringing a pair of shoes for me to try at the milonga last night … thus making it very clear that, yes, we do wear the same size. Given her shoe collection, this was very brave. 😉
After trying on shoes and talking, I did actually dance last night. I danced quite a lot. I found my energy again, which had gone wandering along with everyone else’s (or so it seemed). One tanda in particular was incredible. There is a leader with whom I enjoy dancing, but for various reasons I am usually hesitant to seek him out for dances. I connected with him for a waltz set, and it was one of those beautiful, meditative, relaxed-but-thrilling tandas.
I was able to get into a meditative state of dancing. I wasn’t on trial, I knew I wasn’t going to be thrown with strange or new challenges. His lead is incredibly clear while also being relaxed and musical. He played with the music nicely, and I felt changes in dynamic as well as tempo. I have no idea how he experienced the tanda, but for me it was amazing. Every time I felt myself tensing up I just breathed into it and relaxed. The music flowed, we danced, and despite a crowded and sometimes navigationally challenging floor, I never felt the need to open my eyes.